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Friday, April 07, 2006 

You know you're in a Korean buffet restaurant when...

Buffet restaurants here are quite the novelty. The name of the particular restaurant I was taken to by a Korean friend is VIPS. Koreans pronounce it as a word "vips" rather than pronouncing each letter as it should be. It's one of the nicer/nicest restaurants (of the chain variety) in the city, which should tell you a lot. As I said in a comment on Jen's blog, I just want to scream, "You know how you think all Americans are fat?? This has a lot to do with that!" But then I think to myself that a chubby Korean here or there wouldn't be so bad, and so I just smile, and convince them to get seconds/thirds/fourths.

You know you're in a Korean buffet restaurant when...

  • the shrimp isn't battered and fried and, gasp, requires peeling
  • the salmon is raw (on purpose)
  • there are all the makings for sandwiches with instructions (hello)
  • the "salad bar" is actually twenty different bowls full of strange salads, 99.7% of which have crab, squid, or other aquarium attractions in them
  • they have the makings for tacos (also with instructions, if I remember correctly)
  • the only fried food on the entire buffet consists of one bowl, which is labeled "fried things" (I'm so not joking). The "fried things" consisted of spring rolls, chicken nuggets, and something similar to an onion ring (I use the singular word "something" because there was only one in the entire bowl)
  • the only thing resembling french fries were on the dessert bar, glazed with a sweet sticky sauce (and named "sweet 'n salty)
  • instead of offering vanilla, vanilla/chocolate swirl, and chocolate, the machine offers vanilla, vanilla/green tea swirl, and green tea ice cream
  • the toppings for the ice cream are: fruit loops, walnuts, raisins, and blueberry sauce
  • there are instructions on how to make a banana split above the ice cream machine

I happen to be a big fan of green tea flavored things - I was devastated when Starbucks took their green tea frappucino off the menu (which was rather like a dessert), and although they did add a green tea latte, it's just not the same. That being said, all the seafood would make me yark. Is this supposed to be an American- themed buffet or something? Why all the novelty stuff, like tacos and sandwiches and stuff? Are they mocking us? I should take a picture of the Barnhill's buffet for you to show off - now THAT's an american buffet, with a southern twist. Finding food that ISN'T fried is a chore. Collard greens and black-eyed peas abound, and the only seafood you'll find (when it isn't seafood night) is fried catfish. Mmm-mmm, that's good eating. BTW, I have posted on my blog TWICE now.

They should have instructions somewhere on how to eat all that crappy seafood crap without puking. That's what we need instructions for.

--Bethany

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