I am stressed out.
The ticker on this page is, again, not right. Subtract one day. In a little over an hour, my day of departure will be a short 7 days away! There exists no e-lingo exclamation which could properly express how I am feeling right now. In some ways I am SUPER stressed out. I have a lot to get done before next Tuesday rolls around, but it is all stuff that must be done in its own time. It's not stuff I've put off, or stuff I can tackle all at once and get done in a day. I'm quite overwhelmed. I feel like there's some girl I know, and it's her that's leaving Korea, and not me. Every now and then, reality comes a-knockin', and I have this brief realization "Holy cow! It's ME! I'm the one that's leaving!" But then that realization fades, and I go back to the state of delusion/denial.
It's so strange. Because like this afternoon when I was at Costco, I could not WAIT to get out of Korea. But then there's the stuff about Korea I like, and that stuff is making it really hard to leave. Make no mistake about it, I AM leaving. But it's going to be a lot harder than I ever realized.
I've decided to rent a car and drive back to Pensacola rather than flying. I'm sick to death of airplanes and flying, and I haven't even started the trip yet. I'm spending the night of Feb. 27 in Atlanta as well, just to be able to sleep, rest, and relax before being thrust back into the world of my family (and for those of you who read this blog and are related to me, you know it's not you I'm talking about). I plan on utilizing the Chik-Fil-A gift card my Dad sent me for Christmas (he knew there weren't any of them here, it was a motivator for me to come back). I plan on letting my poor dog stretch out on the passenger seat of the car (she'll have earned the right, after being cooped up in her kennel for as long as she'll have to be), and taking it easy. I'm getting a car with GPS as well, so if I get lost, it won't be my fault. :)
Tomorrow begins my last week of work. This past weekend was a holiday here - the new year as based on the lunar calendar. I'll be working Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. There's no teaching right now - both the kindergarten and elementary students are on vacation right now. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do...but I'll be there. Actually, I plan on spending tomorrow cleaning out my desk and my computer (Lis will be taking over my place), posting some pictures taken over the last few weeks, and burning some music from my iTunes in preparation for my road trip. I wish I knew someone with nothing better to do than to somehow make it to Atlanta on the 28th only to ride back to Florida with me. But at the same time, it might be good for me to have the time alone. I'm trying to prepare myself...because I didn't have any reverse culture shock to speak of when I went back for vacation. (Except the constant surprise at how everyone spoke English, and the persistent bowing to authority figures.) But that was vacation. Knowing I'm going to be staying...I get the impression it will be rather overwhelming.
On a lighter note...here's a few things I'm not devastated to be leaving behind:
1. Korean commercials...commercials overall are irritating, but Korean commercials, with the irrepressible need for "cutsey" is just beyond grating.
2. Pickled/fermented food being present at every (Korean) meal
3. The staring....ohhhhhhhhhhh the staring - seriously, I could go on about how much this bothers me and how often it happens, but everyone who could possibly read this (save for Lis, Beth, and Adam) would probably think I sounded schizophrenic. But really...blessed anonymity, here I come.
That's enough for now. I think I'll try to post a few of these everytime I blog for the next few days (until I leave) to keep myself psyched up about going back.
There may not be any e-lingo to express your feelings, but how about smilies? How about this one? (you will have to follow the link, it won't let me put images in comments)
And yeah, if you don't prepare for it, the reverse culture shock is worse! hope everything will go smoothly for you.
Posted by Anonymous | 5:31 AM
Ack! Sorry, I didn't close the link. You will have to click on that last line to view the image instead :(
Posted by Anonymous | 5:35 AM
How does your dog pee on such a long trip? Anonymity...why that is as American as apple pie! Be safe!! Let me know your times for ATL....Love GA mom
Posted by Anonymous | 12:04 PM