Kimchi, not for me

I was up until 4 AM this morning doing....a variety of things. Then, in a surprise move, I got up at 10:00 AM this morning. I know many of you, perhaps even most of you, sleep six hours a night, or maybe even less. I, however, cannot do it. Luckily, I'm at a time and place in my life where that's okay for now. I usually get 8-9 hours of sleep a night. If I sleep less than eight hours, I am a very grumpy person. But I decided I didn't want to waste my weekend by sleeping. So I got up and wasted most of my Saturday doing pointless things. I did go shopping this afternoon though - my phone card ran out awhile ago, and I've been dialing direct so I'm really not looking forward to my next phone bill. Anyway, they only sell the phone cards in a certain part of town, so I went over there. I was also planning on stopping by a used bookstore I've been to before. However, the bookstore does not exist anymore. That was disappointing. Then the foreign food store also in that part of town didn't have any chickpeas (they usually carry them). They still don't carry tahini. That was disappointing also. But then I went to the other bookstore, who seems to have bought the stock from the used bookstore that closed, and bought 9 books for around 45 dollars. I got two copies of The Case for Christ, one for me and one for one of the girls in the small group I'm leading. I got God's Smuggler, a book by Andrew Murray, Through Gates of Splendor by Elizabeth Elliot, The Pursuit of Holiness, The Problem of Pain (I'm on a C.S. Lewis kick), a book by a Russian writer from the 1800s, and a book about the assassination of the Romanovs in the Russian revolution (from the ongoing Russian kick I've been on). I also bought a $30 wallet. That's a lot to spend on a wallet, but I absolutely love it, and since it's Korean, I imagine it'll be the right size for their money. It's a wallet that would be much cooler to have back home than here, because the design is traditional Korean kind of art, so I'm going to look stupid with it maybe, but it's an awesome wallet. And I talked to lady down from 35...which is good for me. I am a bad bargainer, because it makes me feel guilty. You know, now that I think about it, I didn't say anything. She talked herself down. But I bought it...ah well. I also got a few things to put into the packages I'm working on for Haley and Bethany.

And now I'm home and tired. The subway ride to that part of town is an hour each way (course it's an hour subway ride to my church too and that's not too far from my house), and all the walking....and so many people. I realized that one reason I stay in so often on the weekends is because it's just exhausting going out. Not for actual reasons (like walking too much or anything) but because the constant jostling, being run into, being stared at, being talked about, having to fight the crowds everywhere...it's just tiring. I don't know how to put it into words, but it takes a different kind of energy to go out among the population here. I've been here for nine and a half months, and am happy. I understand a lot of the culture, but there's still the issue of foreign. I'm in a foreign place, and I am a foreigner. Being in a foreign place can be exhausting, but being a foreigner is a completely different thing and brings about a completely different kind of exhaustion. I had to go to the part of town near the US base, so there's lots of white people and English speaking over there, not to mention a subway. I got a sandwich from there, and the lady beside me in line made small talk with me (the friendly kind, not the "get out of my way" kind) and it made me so happy I almost got emotional. I don't know if I could have put my finger on the kind of exhaustion I felt before that happened today...but being a foreigner and sticking out like a sore thumb all the time is just old. I'm so over it.

Well this is much longer than I had anticipated. I'm going to go relax in the safety of my apartment. Do allow me to say that any spelling errors in this post are due to the fact that my cat is laying on top of me and I'm having to look at the computer screen through his e-collar. Monday morning (when the stitches come out and the ecollar comes off) cannot come soon enough.