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Wednesday, September 06, 2006 

Saying Goodbye...

Those are the first words to one of the songs from the movie "Muppets Take Manhattan." I watched that movie so many times growing up that, to this day, my older sisters can quote it. I could write the song, but I'm not going to. To put down a song about how difficult goodbyes are is cheesy enough, once you add in that the song was sang by a bunch of Muppets...just enters a realm of cheesiness even I am uncomfortable with. But anyway, I leave in the morning to fly back to Pensacola. And that means I will be, yet again, saying goodbye to my best friend. I had been gone for so long that I never even began to fathom how difficult it would be to spend a few days with her and have to leave again. I had gotten used to not seeing her.

In addition to spending time with Bethany, I was able to spend time with two other extremely close and wonderful friends from college (Neil and Mike Smith), and Bethany's family. I cannot even put into words how refreshing the past four days have been. Yet at the same time, I feel like I am now in a very difficult spot. I had every intention of staying in Korea another year (that year starting in March once my current contract is finished). Now I'm not so sure. And you know what? It's not the food, or the language, or the familiarity, or any of the comforts - it's none of the things I thought I missed the most. It's the people - not all the people (and I'll leave it to you to read between the lines about who might be left out), but some of the people.

I suppose the good news is that my flights to Pensacola (via Memphis, a fact I still can't believe) will probably go by quickly, as all the major reunions have already happened.

I have some thoughts I want to share about a specific idol in my life, but I'm quite sure it would make this post far too long. I'll wait...another night. Or around 3 AM. I don't know if I've mentioned this or not, but I have woken up every morning between 2:45 and 3:00 AM since I got here. I don't know why that is. Also, I usually have a difficult time waking up. I set my alarm early so I can snooze it and at least make myself think I'm sleeping in. But since I've been here (in the States, that is, not just Orlando), around 7-ish, I go from a dead sleep to wide awake. It's strange. I'm hoping to avoid the whole 3:00 AM thing since that time is only two hours away right now. We'll see how that goes. Until later all...

My dear, try to hold all the comfort and love of friends close to your heart so the 'goodbyes' do not diminish the wonderful spirit refreshing visit you've had. Try not to wallow in uncertainty about your future. LOVE YOU!! GA mom

I remember how hard it was after visits when I lived in California. It was painful to leave again, especially when you're leaving people who really know you and really love you.

Now that I'm back (or at least, far closer than I was) it's still unreal. Every time I leave to go back to Atlanta I feel like it'll be a year (rather than a few weeks) before I'll see them again. I'm sure I'll get over that eventually though.

miss you already...

-Bethany

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